20 Something and what I’ve learned so far

Finally I could say to myself I am now a 20 something girl. It can lead to any confusion because honestly, I am not a girl anymore, but not yet a woman (Hello, Britney?).

Honestly as a 20 something girl, I learned much more than any other girl at same age. I left home by myself at a pretty young age, done almost everything by myself at the time. But I wasn’t always like that. Before, I was always good at school, good marks, good behaviour (quite rebel now and there), I respect my teacher, but I was a spoiled and lazy brat. Okay let’s be honest, I am pretty sure I would get everything that I wanted, if I spoke about it. I never do the house chores because duh “Hotel Mama” (It’s a German term when you still live with your mom) and even though I was at my father, his helpers would do the chores. So it was a surprised for people who know me to hear my decision to go abroad at such a young age. They were all wondering if I could survive alone in a foreign country. Even I was wondering to myself and at some point I doubted the idea of going abroad. Then, people talked about how impossible it was for me to be independent at such a young age remembered I was a spoiled kid. One thing that I like about me is whenever people doubt me, I want to prove them wrong and so now I proof them wrong. I kept going with the idea and I wanted to prove them wrong so badly. Look at me, survived and still alive in a foreign country that I’m starting to call it home.

One thing for sure, it was hard at first. It was hard to adjust from the distance, it was hard to adjust from the food, the weather, the culture and especially the language. The first two weeks were a living hell for me. All the time I was thinking about giving up the whole idea about going to school in Germany or living abroad in general. I just couldn’t stand it. It was a big culture shock for me, but then I met many new friends. They helped me little by little to adjust with the culture. They spoke to me everyday so I could improve my German quickly. I met lots other people with different background, we talked a lot about different things mostly about their culture, their value of family and their hobbies. At the time I realized that I like to meet people and talked about something deep and meaningful, not just an usual weather chit chat. Even though I am actually a shy and awkward person. For me to open up conversation with new people, is scary, exciting, nervous and curious at the same thing. The feelings are mixed into one.  I notice that people are different, there are no identically same person. Each individual is interesting, inspiring and coming from different background with story to tell.

I learned a lot from them. I learned how to bake  from a lady friend of mine, who can make the best green tea cake I’ve ever tasted, I learned how to grind a soapstone, I learned poetry. I know one time my first roommate was teaching me how to use dishwasher and washing machine because I’ve never done it myself before, at home there were always people who clean up after me. The first time I had to do it alone, I was nervous. I had that feeling if I touched a button, then it exploded, but it was just a paranoia and of course it was unreasonable. From that moment on, I did my own house-chores (Boom! in Your face people). I learned many skill from different people. I heard their story because I know I could learn something from them, but the true lesson I learn from people is, that we met for a reason. Sometimes they are staying with you the whole time and sharing your best laughter, your misery and angst, but not a few friends  are just a hello or like intersections that are meet at a point and never meet again. One thing, I find it pitiful is when people you used to share your story with, now just to be somebody that you used to know. Maybe just like one of my used to close friend said, “time is changing and so is people.” Yes, a lot of things happened and it is amazing what a year can do. A stranger last year can mean so much to you and it is terrible to see someone who meant so much to you last year or last couple of months could be a stranger now.

I am grateful to have them by my side
People might go but the memories stay

Relax, let go, my life is in perfect flow,


Review: “Die mit dem Bauch Tanzen” – Belly Dancing Is The New Botox

At the end of the day, I would spend my weekend with my Auntie instead of studying and preparing for my final exam in university. So like two weeks ago or maybe more? I can’t remember it anymore but it was somewhere in January, anyway it is not relevant when. I and my Auntie went to cinema to watch “Die Mit Dem Bauch Tanzen”. It is a German documentation film from Carolin Genreith about growing old. She made a documentation about her mom, her mom’s belly dancing’s group and a lot thinking about her own generation. One thing I can sure about, in the end of the film you’ll be thinking, that is one of bad-ass documentation about your grown-old mother. Continue reading “Review: “Die mit dem Bauch Tanzen” – Belly Dancing Is The New Botox”

Classic Christmas Carol

Classic Christmas Carol

Although I am not celebrating christmas personally, I am in a such festive mood and couldn’t wait until it comes because simply it’s christmas!

I am start packaging some small gifts for my relatives and friends and I couldn’t wait to give them as my thank you and appreciate for them and you know what, I have made this playlist especially for you so you could wait and counting days until christmas with classic christmas song (Just click the title above ^^) Continue reading “Classic Christmas Carol”

Dream, Daydream or Nightmare?


Anyone has one, two or maybe thousands dream right? Most of them are wealth, fame or simply happiness. I had a dream too, or I would prefer called them goals. When I was in junior high school it was my goal to study aboard, gained experience that at that time not every children could get. I was scared but silly me I was so overwhelmed by my dream to live aboard and leave everything behind. My family and friends. So I set my feet in germany. It was not my first time I was there. My papa took me for a month vacation in Germany. We rented a car and go to Bavaria to see Neuschwanstein castle, tried bratwurst and see beautiful Bavaria culture, then move on to Frankfurt to see their skyscrapers building, drove along Autobahn (highway) to Berlin to be captivated by its diversity and warm welcoming atmosphere. I knew in that moment I’d love to come again but not as a tourist but as student. As much as I love Indonesia but their curriculum bored me to hell. I want something exciting and challenging and I know i can get it when I learn new language and learn here, graduate Abitur and go to University.

So far I fulfil almost all of my dream. I went aboard, studied German, graduate in most challenging designation with compromising marks and currently studying in one of the most well-known University not only in Germany but also in the world, but then what did I miss? I know I should been thankful because I can pursued my dream and I have my family and my friends behind me. On the other hand, I know I missed something…

if I would not have been so naive and thought about it again, I would be at home, see how my brother grown up so fast, be strong for him and always by his side. I would have been always near my family be there if my mama need me, I would have been always there if my papa cooked and always support him in every his dream. Actually I regretted my decision to come to Germany but then on the other hand I had the opportunities and experienced that others don’t have. Do my dream really dream come true or is it just a beautiful nightmare?

Home sweet home

So if I could sit around on the sofa after dinner, I would do it all night long. This is like one of my favourite activity to do aft dinner (after playing board or card games) and that’s actually what I do right now. After having dinner for Tobias (we had nice summer grill even though it was cloudy and windy), we sat on the sofa and enjoyed our nice ice cream while watching “DFB Pokal”. I don’t really a big fan of soccer but I am really like the atmosphere we have right now. Just a a big family enjoying soccer game from Germany league.

We are watching FC Bayern and Stuttgart. The champions league winner leading the games 3-2 right now, very exciting game indeed, but that is not what I want to write, the soccer fans would probably read the report on sport-site rather than on my site. This moment right now! This is what I would like to share with you guys..

9 people are sitting in living room, all eyes on the television, well except for Tobias’ sister, she is trap on her history novel but sometimes she is watching the television and looked kind of distracted of our reaction toward the games. How I love this moment right now, even though I am not biologically part of the family but I feel really warm and accepted in this circle. They are really nice to me, I am very grateful to find them and they accept me warm hearted on their arm. On the other side, in this moment like this I miss my family and how miss to have a quality time with time, chit chatting or even laughing of something silly. Oh well but I am looking forward to see my father and brother on my graduation day 🙂

My word of the day: take your time with your family while you have it 😉